In deep fear: Gurrelieder blaring through my ears. Mortified by the thought that I might suddenly (very loudly) join in with one of its ecstatic moments (dangers of knowing the words too well)… or even just starting humming. The office is really very quiet.
Last Saturday’s Turangalîla was fabulous too (live). I was very upset by how disrespectful the orchestra was though: I was utterly entranced by it and wanted to bring the ondiste back a third time, but they had so little regard for the music that they brought the extra players for the next piece on stage while we were trying to aplaud them for the last one! Their stupid joke piece at the end was more important to them than the thing we’d come to hear. I was totally caught up in the euphoria of the sound-world though, which I find extremely moving, especially the haunting, longing sweetness of the three love themes. Composers like Messiaen and Bruchner are real gift to us, because unlike for the gorgeous richness of Mahler, Schoenberg and Elgar, we don’t have to switch our minds off to the sordid words.